Broadside
Cracking Up with Cook Popular Stand-Up Comic Takes the Stage at the Patriot Center
|By John Powell, Asst. Sports Editor
Controversy is apparently wrapped in jeans and a t-shirt. When people look at comedian Dane Cook, he makes people laugh or people hate.
From his humble beginnings of performing in a laundromat for his first standup show, Cook has gained international acclaim after appearing on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend in 1998.
His standup has given him roles in more than 20 movies and TV shows going back to 1997. He has appeared on The Late Show with David Letterman, Comedy Central Presents, and has even hosted Saturday Night Live.
Detroit’s For Sale, But Nobody’s Buying: Michigan Making Up for Economy by State Sale
|By Brandon Minster, Staff Writer
About once a week, I have a serious discussion with myself that starts with, what do I want to be when I grow up? And usually near the top of my list is auctioneer.
The career combines the best of all other jobs. Fast, unintelligible talking, “do I hear five, five, five, do I hear wharlgurlgarble hamanahamana”, but at a much higher wage than working a fast food restaurant.
Describing people’s shameful character traits, “sold to the obese, balding woman in the back row,” but with more regular gigs than an insult comic.
South Africa Welcomes the FIFA World Cup: The Value of Soccer on an International Stage
|By Justin Lalputan, Broadside Correspondent
There are only two sporting events in the world that cause nearly every single country to stop what they are doing to watch, and both occur every four years. One is the Olympics, which occurs during the winter and summer.
The other is the FIFA World Cup. Many people, especially Americans, dismiss it as a simple soccer game, but it is far from that.
The World Cup is a large-scale soccer tournament that can have effects that many world leaders wish they could conjure.
In My Own Words: Midterm Examination
|By Fernanda Bartels, Staff Writer
The last couple of weeks were midterm evaluation period. It is time for midterm evaluations in the classroom and also on the court. Besides finals period, midterms are the second most stressful part of the semester.
All the deadlines for major projects, papers, presentations and exams seem to accumulate in one week.
If you are lucky, your “hell week” may be spread in two weeks. It is exam after exam on top of endless homework. We also encounter the exhaustion of the college routine around midterm time.
Pink Beats the Panthers: Mason Moves Past Tribe for Third Place
|By Brian T. Chan, Sports Editor
Supporting breast cancer awareness, the George Mason University women’s volleyball team sported their pink uniforms. Even with the different look, Mason (19-7, 8-3) carried out the match in a familiar fashion they had throughout this season, defeating the Georgia State Panthers in four sets on Saturday night.
It All Starts With the Owner: Snyder’s Ideology Should Be Bottom-up
|By Chris DeMarco, Staff Writer
Another Redskins’ loss brings more and more criticism onto the organization. In the Redskins’ first seven games, they have played six winless teams. As a result, they are only 2-5.
They gave the lowly Detroit Lions their first win in 19 games. That is the closest thing to a highlight for the Redskins this year, and it is definitely not a pretty one.
The media can only blame Head Coach Jim Zorn so much. He does what he can with what he is provided, which is practically a team made up like a fantasy football team.
Major League Soccer Playoffs
|By Donald O’Mahony, Staff Writer
First Round:
Los Angeles Galaxy vs. Chivas USA:
This matchup includes the two teams that share the Home Depot Center in Los Angeles. The star-studded Galaxy boasts players like Landon Donovan and David Beckham, along with many other players that have experience at the highest level. No team lost fewer games than the Galaxy this season and I expect them to advance.
Houston Dynamo vs. Seattle Sounders:
The Season Finale: Mason Misses Postseason after Dukes’ Win
|By John Powell, Asst. Sports Editor
As the clouds loomed during a murky Halloween afternoon, the George Mason University women’s soccer team recognized the nine seniors on the team during the pregame festivities, starting off the final game of the season for the Patriots.
“I definitely think, since this is our best record since 1994, we’ve done great. Winning the last five games proved how much dedication and heart we had,” said senior forward Theresa DeLucca on the season.
In Bed with Billy: Does Size Really Matter?
|By Billy Curtis, Sex Columnist
Once upon a time, there was a young girl with long golden hair. She wandered the lands far and wide in search of something she was direly looking for – the perfect sausage.
The girl saw many things she thought she would never see and felt things she never thought she would feel along the way, but none of the sausages she had were good enough.
Then finally, she came to a house. The girl slowly opened the front door and walked into a kitchen with three plates on the table. Each plate had a sausage on it and she decided to try each one.
Tuesday Jams: Baby Grand Takes the Stage at Jazzman’s
|By Chris Earp, Broadside Correspondent
Happy to get out of the October drizzle, I ducked into the warmth of Jazzman’s.
Not many people were there, save for some film students taping the show and a couple of coffee drinkers.
It seemed that the only people intently eyeing the “stage” (which was simply the corner opposite the entrance) were directly related to the event in some capacity or another.