In Bed With Billy: The Top 10 Men You Need To Avoid

By Broadside Sex Columnist Billy Curtis

There are 10 things I will most definitely hate about you. There are more than 10 things that most likely everyone would hate about everyone. Bad kisser, over-talkative, vain; the list could go on and on for hours, maybe even days. Luckily, most of us know what we want, and what we clearly need to stay away from when we’re looking for a partner. Sadly still, there are some who would, could, and shouldn’t believe that these types of men can change, and end up making you happy for the rest of your life.

These tragic attempts of contempt are sad stories to watch, let alone hear about. We’ve all encountered at least one of these 10 rejects that somehow manage to rule our lives at some point. Though, with every encounter we manage to grow and become stronger people. For those of you who have never been lucky enough to have your heart broken or your world turned upside down by one of these pitiful fools, take this as a warning to stay away and notice the warning signs. Let the countdown begin:

10. The Moocher or Cheap Date. You’ve imagined the perfect date, romantic dinner or a movie, and maybe even some great conversation. Then your bubble is completely popped as your date tells you that he’s taking you to McDonald’s and has a sweet chick flick waiting for the two of you at his place. Not to mention that you’d need to stick to the dollar menu when you order dinner and get your food in a small cardboard box from recycled trash. Does this sound like a perfect first date to you? Where’s the romance, people? Chivalry hasn’t died yet, has it?

9. The Mama’s Boy. When you’re in a relationship, you want to come first. Family is important, but when your boyfriend is more receptive to his mother than he is to you, that’s a clear sign to head for the hills. After all, most people want to date a grown adult . . . not someone who wants cookies and milk before he goes to bed served by the only real women or special person in his life. Second place is never fun.

8. The One-Upper. See Kanye West. He’s a prime example of a person you don’t want. Having someone tell you that their problems are worse than yours is so wrong, not to mention just plain rude. You want someone to comfort you, to listen to your problems and maybe tell you how to make it better, not to be told that your problems are nothing considered to the boss they hate and the annoying roommates they have that completely beat all your problems combined.

7. The Over-Emotional or Emotionally Guarded. Sometimes extremes can be fun, but on either end of this spectrum is a place you never want to be. Sometimes too much emotion can drown you out and make you feel lost in your partner’s world. While on the other hand, you could be dating the person who will never want to let you in, and it’s not because he doesn’t like you, but because he’d rather hold everything in. Try and stick in the middle of this awkward balancing act, because tipping in either direction is going to leave you off kilter in the end.

6. Anyone Who Resembles Your Ex in Any Way. Someone who is going to remind you of times and relationships past is always going to do so. Actions, physical appearance, attitude; no matter what it may be, these men are trouble, so just keep moving forward, and find someone who won’t remind you of him.

5. The “Anything-Aholic.” Addictions are never fun. Be it, drugs, work, videogames, or even you. Some people just can’t have enough of it, and you’ll be left to pick up whatever pieces they leave behind. So do what you know is best; get them help if you can, and if you can’t, head for the hills because no one needs to get pulled down by someone else’s  addictions.

4. The Secret Drug User. While this person may follow the lines of the “Anything-Aholic”, odds are they will never tell you. They will lie, steal, and cheat their way into keeping you oblivious from their secret using behaviors. Relationships aren’t meant to be keepers of secrets, and if he can’t be honest with himself, what makes you think he will be honest with you?

3. The One Night-Stander. While I will admit, one night stands can be fun, they only solve one thing, and that’s clearly just the primal urge of getting your jives off. Do not attempt to make these seemingly sleepless nights of sheer bliss—or nights of regret—more than what they really are, bad decisions. So don’t make them, save the sex for someone who will actually care about it, not to mention, remember your name.

2. The Serial Cheater. Incidence after incidence, mistake after mistake; this man will do everything he can to keep you believing that he’s a good fit for you. But peeking behind the curtains will reveal a whole lot, maybe even an entire different life. Time and time again, he will go back to where he once was, and obviously still wants to be. Unfortunately, that’s something you’re going to have to find out alone.

1. The Already-taken or Married Man. A man more elusive and toxic than my previous sex life; this is an act so old, Hell, even presidents still do it! Well some people talk about being the exception, or one of the lucky ones. Don’t be one of the lucky ones, because odds are he will just eventually do it to you too!

Don’t be the victim. Know the difference and find someone who will actually love you, and not open up your world to the drama and mistakes that have enveloped their lives.  And when you do find the right person, you’ll know it, trust me!